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- Questions about the 2010 Olympics -

Category: Canadian Jokes/Canadian Identity Jokes

From:	bossdog
Author:	Unknown
Added:	February 23, 2010
Modified:	February 23, 2010
Views:	3275
Votes:	51
Rating:	9.66

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Questions about the 2010 Olympics:

These questions were actually posted on an International Tourism site.

When Vancouver won the chance to host the 2010 Winter Olympics, these are some questions that people from around the world were asking...

These questions were actually posted on an International Tourism site.

Q: "I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow?" (England)
A: "We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch them die."

Q: "Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street?" (USA)
A: Depends on how much you've been drinking.

Q: "I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto. Can I follow the railroad tracks?" (Sweden)
A: "Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water."

Q: "Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada?" (Sweden)
A: "So it's true what they say about Swedes."

Q: "Are there any ATM's (cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax?" (England)
A: "What, did your last slave die?"

Q: "Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada?" (USA)
A: "A-fri-ca is the big triangle-shaped continent south of Europe. Ca-na-da is that big country to your North... nevermind. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked."

Q: "Which direction is North in Canada?" (USA)
A: "Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions."

Q: "Can I bring cutlery into Canada?" (England)
A: "Why? Just use your fingers like we do."

Q: "Do you have perfume in Canada?" (Germany)
A: "No, WE don't stink."

Q: "I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Where can I sell it in Canada?" (USA)
A: "Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather."

Q: "Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population?" (Italy)
A: "Yes, gay nightclubs."

Q: "Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada?" (USA)
A: "Only at Thanksgiving."

Q: "Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round?" (Germany)
A: "No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is illegal."

Q: "I have a question about a famous animal in Canada , but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns." (USA)
A: "It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking."

Q: "Will I be able to speak English most places I go?" (USA)
A: "Yes, but you will have to learn it first."

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Joke Comments

2 Rdnecks having a beer
Ahahaha, I feel like I have some friends who this happened to in real life!
By Anonymous
3 stupid men
That is hilarious! After hearing what the pilot says... *finger snap over head in valley girl style*
By Anonymous
The New Hockey Player
This is not funny. It is messed up.
By Anonymous
Newfie Air Disaster
Frickin lolz!
By Anonymous
God on the 8th day
I wish I could visit Canada.
By Anonymous